Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind

Joel: "I can't see anything that I don't like about you."

Clementine: "But you will! But you will. You know, you will think of things. And I'll get bored with you and feel trapped because that's what happens with me."

Joel: "Okay."

Clementine: "Okay."

"I could die right now, Clem. I'm just... happy. I've never felt that before. I'm just exactly where I want to be." - Joel

"Sometimes I don't think people realize how lonely it is to be a kid. Like... you don't matter." - Clementine

"Why do I fall in love with every woman I see who shows me the least bit of attention?" - Joel

"You looked happy. Happy with a secret." - Stan

Joel: "Is there any risk of brain damage?"

Howard: "Well, technically speaking, the operation is brain damage, but it's on a par with a night of heavy drinking. Nothing you'll miss."

Joel: "Hi."

Clementine: "Hi. Didn't figure you'd show your face around me again. I guess I thought you were... humiliated. You did run away, after all."

Joel: "I just needed to see you."

Clementine: "Yeah?"

Joel: "I'd like to, um... take you out, or something."

Clementine: "You're married."

Joel: "Not yet, not married. No, I'm not married."

Clementine: "Look man, I'm telling you right off the bat, I'm high-maintainance, so... I'm not gonna tip-toe around your marriage, or whatever it is you've got goin' there. If you wanna be with me, you're with me."

Joel: "Okay."

Clementine: "Too many guys think I'm a concept, or I complete them, or I'm gonna make them alive. But I'm just a fucked-up girl who's lookin' for my own peace of mind; don't assign me yours."

Joel: "I remember that speech really well."

Clementine: "I had you pegged, didn't I?"

Joel: "You had the whole human race pegged."

Clementine: "Hmm. Probably."

Joel: "I still thought you were gonna save my life... even after that."

Clementine: "Ohhh... I know."

Joel: "It would be different, if we could just give it another go-round."

Clementine: "Remember me. Try your best; maybe we can."

Joel: "I have to go. I have to catch my ride."

Clementine: "So go!"

Joel: "I did. I thought maybe you were a nut... but you were exciting."

Clementine: "I wish you had stayed."

Joel: "I wish I had stayed too. NOW I wish I had stayed. I wish I had done a lot of things. I wish I had... I wish I had stayed. I do."

Clementine: "Well I came back downstairs and you were gone!"

Joel: "I walked out, I walked out the door!"

Clementine: "Why?"

Joel: "I don't know. I felt like a scared little kid, I was like... it was above my head, I don't know."

Clementine: "You were scared?"

Joel: "Yeah. I thought you knew that about me. I ran back to the bonfire, trying to outrun my humiliation, I think."

Clementine: "Was it something I said?"

Joel: "Yeah... you said "so go." With such disdain, you know?"

Clementine: "Oh, I'm sorry."

Joel: "It's okay."

Clementine: "Joely? What if you stayed this time?"

Joel: "I walked out the door. There's no memory left."

Clementine: "Come back and make up a good-bye at least. Let's pretend we had one."

Clementine: "Bye Joel."

Joel: "I love you."

Clementine: "Meet me... in Montauk..."

"Constantly talking isn't necessarily communicating." - Joel

Clementine: "This is it, Joel. It's going to be gone soon."

Joel: "I know."

Clementine: "What do we do?"

Joel: "Enjoy it."

"Sand is overrated. It's just tiny, little rocks." - Joel

"Random thoughts for Valentine's day, 2004. Today is a holiday invented by greeting card companies to make people feel like crap." - Voiceover

Clementine: "Joely?"

Joel: "Yeah Tangerine?"

Clementine: "Am I ugly?"

Joel: "Uh-uh."

Clementine: "When I was a kid, I thought I was. I can't believe I'm crying already. Sometimes I think people don't understand how lonely it is to be a kid, like you don't matter. So, I'm eight, and I have these toys, these dolls. My favorite is this ugly girl doll who I call Clementine, and I keep yelling at her, "You can't be ugly! Be pretty!" It's weird, like if I can transform her, I would magically change, too."

Joel: "You're pretty."

Clementine: "Joely, don't ever leave me."

Joel: "You're pretty... you're pretty... pretty..."

"Adults are, like, this mess of sadness and phobias." - Mary

"What a loss to spend that much time with someone, only to find out that she's a stranger." - Joel

Clementine: "You know me, I'm impulsive."

Joel: "That's what I love about you."

"Are we like those bored couples you feel sorry for in restaurants? Are we the dining dead? I can't stand the idea of us being a couple people think that about." - Joel

"My God, there's people coming out of your butt." - Joel

Clementine: "What took you so long?"

Joel: "I just walked in."

Clementine: "Do you miss me?"

Joel: "Oddly enough, I do!"

Clementine: "You said "I do" - I guess that means we're married!"

Joel: "I guess so!"

Joel: "I had a really nice time last night."

Clementine: "Nice?"

Joel: "I had the best fucking night of my entire fucking life, last night!"

Clementine: "Thaaaat's better!"

Clementine: "And in your little brain. You try to figure out, "Did she fuck someone tonight?"

Joel: "No, see Clem. I assume you fucked someone tonight. Isn't that how you get people to like you?"

"I don't need nice. I don't need myself to be it, and I don't need anybody else to be it at me." - Clementine

Joel: "I can't remember anything without you."

Clementine: "Aw, that's... very sweet, but try."

"Maybe you can find yourself a nice antique rocking chair to die in." - Clementine

Patrick: "Baby, whats wrong?"

Clementine: "I don't know! I DON'T KNOW! I'm lost! I'm scared! I feel like I'm disappearing! MY SKIN'S COMING OFF! I'M GETTING OLD! Nothing makes any sense to me! NOTHING MAKES ANY SENSE!"

"Joel, hide me in your humiliation!" - Clementine

Clementine: "You're not a stalker, or anything, right?"

Joel: "I'm not a stalker. YOU'RE the one that talked to me, remember?"

Clementine: "That is the oldest trick in the stalker book."

Joel: "Really? There's a stalker book? Great, I gotta read that one."

"I think your name is magical." - Joel

Patrick: "You know that girl we did last week? The one with the potatoes."

Stan: "That girl? Yeah, that's this guy's girl."

Patrick: "Yeah."

Stan: "Right... Was. Took care of that."

Patrick: "Well uh, I kind of fell in love with her that night."

Stan: "What? You little fuck!"

Patrick: "What?"

Stan: "She was unconscious, man."

Patrick: "Well, she was beautiful and... I stole a pair of her panties as well."

Stan: "Jesus!"

Patrick: "What? It's not like - I mean they were clean and all."

Stan: "Don't tell me this stuff! I don't wanna hear this shit!"

"Look at it out here, it's all falling apart. I'm erasing you and I'm happy!" - Joel

"You don't tell me things, Joel. I'm an open book. I tell you everything, every damn, embarrassing thing." - Clementine

Joel: [on tape recording] "And the whole thing with the hair - it's all bullshit."

Joel: "I really like your hair."

Clementine: "Thank you."

Clementine: "I'm Clementine. Can I... borrow a piece of your chicken?"

Joel: "And then you just took it... without waiting for an answer. It was so intimate; like we were already lovers."

"I'm a vindictive little bitch, truth be told!" - Clementine

"Can you hear me? I don't want this any more! I want to call it off!" - Joel

Clementine: "I'm gonna marry you... I know it!"

Joel: "Ummm... okay..."

"I really want her to pick me up. It's amazing how strong that desire is." - Joel

Joel: "I love being bathed in the sink - such a feeling of security."

Clementine: "I've never seen you happier, baby Joel."

"My embarrassing admission is I really like that you're nice, right now." - Clementine

"I wanted to understand as much as I could about the procedure as possible... I think it's important for my job to understand the inner workings of the work that we do, well not that I do, but the work that is done by people where I also work, the work of my colleagues." - Mary

Clementine: "What are you, NUTS?"

Joel: "It's been suggested."

"If only I could meet someone new. I guess my chances of that happening are somewhat diminished, seeing that I'm incapable of making eye contact with a woman I don't know." - Joel

Joel: "It's 3 o'clock."

Clementine: "I kinda sorta wrecked your car."

Joel: "You were driving drunk. It's pathetic."

Clementine: "I was a little tipsy. Don't call me pathetic."

Joel: "Well, it is pathetic. And it's fucking irresponsible. You could've killed somebody. I don't know, maybe you did kill somebody. Should we turn on the news and see? Should I check the grille to see if there's children or small animals?"

"Drink up, young man. It'll make the whole seduction part less repugnant." - Clementine

"He's seducing my girlfriend with MY words and MY things! He stole her underwear! Jesus Christ, he stole her underwear." - Joel

"He's off the map. He's off the map! - Stan

"...Our files are confidential Mr. Barish so we can't show you any evidence. Suffice it to say, Miss Kruczynski was not happy and she wanted to move on. We provide that possibility." - Howard

"The plane crashed. I didn't crash the plane." - Rob

Patrick: "Mary hates me. I've never been popular with the ladies."

Stan: "Maybe if you stopped stealing their panties."

"That was beautiful to watch, Howard. Like a surgeon or a concert pianist." - Mary

"Pages ripped out. Don't remember doing that. It appears this is my first entry in two years." - Joel

Joel: "I don't know. What if it breaks?"

Clementine: "What if? Do you really care right now?"

"By morning, you'll be gone." - Joel

"She decided to erase you almost as a lark." - Carrie

"I'm fucking crawling out of my skin. I should've left you at the flea market." - Clementine

"He could wake up all half-baked and, gooey and, and half-baked... mmm, that sounds sooo good. I'm hungry." - Mary

Clementine: "It's not gonna crack, or break, or... it's so thick!... Show me which constellations you know."

Joel: "Um... oh... I don't... know any."

Clementine: "Show me which ones you know!"

Joel: "Okay... okay... oh! There's Osidius."

Clementine: "Where?"

Joel: "Right there... see? Sort of a swoop and a cross, Osidius the Emphatic."

Clementine: "You're full of shit, right?"

Joel: "Nope. Osidius, right there, swoop and cross."

Clementine: "Shut the fuck up!"

Clementine: "Look, I'm sorry if I came off a little nutso, I'm not really."

Joel: "That's okay, I really didn't think you were."

Joel: "I'm so ashamed."

Clementine: "It's okay, you're a little kid."

Clementine: "You married?"

Joel: "No."

Clementine: "Let's move into this neighborhood!"

Joel: "I do sorta live with someone though."

Clementine: "Male or female?"

Joel: "What? Female... female..."

Clementine: "At least I'm not barking up the wrong tree!"

"The only Valentine's Day cards I get are from my mother. How pathetic is that?" - Frank

"You're really nice... God, I have to stop saying that!" - Clementine

Clementine: "My crotch is still here, just as you remembered it."

Joel: "Yuck!"

"How happy is the blameless vestal's lot! 

The world forgetting, by the world forgot 

Eternal sunshine of the spotless mind! 

Each pray'r accepted, and each wish resign'd." - Mary