Love Actually

"Whenever I get gloomy with the state of the world, I think about the arrivals gate at Heathrow Airport. General opinion's starting to make out that we live in a world of hatred and greed, but I don't see that. It seems to me that love is everywhere. Often, it's not particularly dignified or newsworthy, but it's always there - fathers and sons, mothers and daughters, husbands and wives, boyfriends, girlfriends, old friends. When the planes hit the Twin Towers, as far as I know, none of the phone calls from the people on board were messages of hate or revenge - they were all messages of love. If you look for it, I've got a sneaky feeling you'll find that love actually is all around."

"Hiya kids. Here is an important message from your Uncle Bill. Don't buy drugs. Become a pop star, and they give you them for free!" - Billy Mack

Daniel: So what's the problem, Sammy-o? Is it just Mum, or is it something else? Maybe... school - are you being bullied? Or is it something worse? Can you give me any clues at all?

Sam: You really want to know?

Daniel: I really want to know.

Sam: Even though you won't be able to do anything to help?

Daniel: Even if that's the case, yeah.

Sam: Okay. Well, the truth is... actually... I'm in love.

Daniel: Sorry?

Sam: I know I should be thinking about Mum all the time, and I am. But the truth is, I'm in love and I was before she died, and there's nothing I can do about it.

Daniel:Aren't you a bit young to be in love?

Sam: No.

Daniel: Oh, well, okay... right. Well, I mean, I'm a little relieved.

Sam: Why?

Daniel: Well, because I thought it would be something worse.

Sam: Worse than the total agony of being in love?

Daniel: Oh. No, you're right. Yeah, total agony.

"I love that word relationship. Covers all manner of sins, doesn't it? I fear that this has become a bad relationship; a relationship based on the President taking exactly what he wants and casually ignoring all those things that really matter to, erm... Britain. We may be a small country, but we're a great one, too. The country of Shakespeare, Churchill, the Beatles, Sean Connery, Harry Potter. David Beckham's right foot. David Beckham's left foot, come to that. And a friend who bullies us is no longer a friend. And since bullies only respond to strength, from now onward I will be prepared to be much stronger. And the President should be prepared for that." - Prime Minister

Enough. Enough now. - Mark

When she first mentioned what's about to happen, I said, "Over my dead body." And she said, "No, Daniel, over mine... "

"Now which doll shall we give Daisy's little friend Emily? The one that looks like a transvestite or the one that looks like a dominatrix?"

"The trouble with being the Prime Minister's sister is, it does put your life into rather harsh perspective. What did my brother do today? He stood up and fought for his country. And what did I do? I made a paper maché lobster head."

Parky: This must be a very exciting moment for you, fighting for the Christmas Number One. How's it looking so far? 

Billy Mack: Very bad indeed... Blue are outselling me five to one. But I'm hoping for a late surge. And if I reach Number One, I promise to sing the song stark naked on TV on Christmas Eve. 
Parky: Do you mean that? 
Billy Mack: Well of course I mean it, Michael. Do you want a preview, you old flirt? 
[stands in front of Parky and flashes at him] 
Parky: That'll never make Number One! 

"When I was young and successful, I was greedy and foolish, and now I'm left with no one. Wrinkled and alone." - Billy Mack

Billy Mack: I realized that Christmas is... is the time to be with the people you love. 
Joe: Right. 
Billy Mack: And I realized that, as dire chance and... and... and fateful cockup would have it, here I am, mid-50s, and without knowing it I've gone and spent most of my adult life with a... with a chubby employee. And... and much as it grieves me to say it, it... it might be that the people I love is, in fact... you. 
[pause] 
Joe: Well, this is a surprise. 
Billy Mack: Yeah. 
Joe: Ten minutes at Elton John's, you're as gay as a maypole!


 But wouldn't it be great if Number One this Christmas wasn't some smug teenager, but an old ex-heroin addict searching for a comeback at any price? All those young popsters, come Christmas Day... they'll be stretched out naked with a cute bird balancing on their balls, and I'll be stuck in some dingy flat with me manager, Joe, ugliest man in the world, --ing miserable because our --ing gamble didn't pay off. So if you believe in Father Christmas, children, like your Uncle Billy does, buy my festering turd of a record. And particularly enjoy the incredible crassness of the moment when we try to squeeze an extra syllable into the fourth line. - Billy Mack

Yes, I'm afraid I am. And I'm sorry for all the cock-ups, my cabinet are absolute crap. We'll have to do better next year. - Prime Minister

Natalie: He says no one's gonna fancy a girl with thighs the size of big tree trunks. Not a nice guy, actually, in the end. 
Prime Minister: Ah! You know, um, being Prime Minister, I could just have him murdered. 
Natalie: Thank you, sir. I'll think about it. 
Prime Minister: Do. The SAS are absolutely charming. Ruthless trained killers are just a phone call away. 

 I know you're Peter's best friend and I know you've never particularly warmed to me. Look, don't... don't argue. We've never got friendly. But I just wanted to say, I hope that can change. I'm nice. I really am. Apart from my terrible taste in pie and... It would be great if we could be friends. - Juliet

Mark: Doesn't mean we'll be able to find the video, though. I had a real search when you first called and couldn't any trace of it, so... 
Juliet: Well, there's one here that says "Peter and Juliet's Wedding". Do you think we might be on the right track? 


Juliet: But... you never talk to me. You always talk to Peter. You don't like me. 
Mark: I hope it's useful. Don't show it around too much. It needs a bit of editing. Look, I've gotta get to a lunch. Early lunch. You can just show yourself out, can't you?  
Mark: It's a... self-preservation thing, you see. 

Jamie: It's my favorite time of day, driving you.
Aurelia: It's the saddest part of my day, leaving you.

Jamie: Er... Would you like the last, uh...? Aurelia: [in Portuguese] Thank you very much, but no. Jamie: No? Aurelia:[in Portuguese] If you saw my sister, you'd understand why. Jamie: That's all right, more for me. Aurelia: [in Portuguese] Just don't go eating it all yourself, you're getting chubbier every day. Jamie: I'm very lucky, I've got one of those constitutions where I never put on weight. Aurelia: Jamie's friends are so good looking! He never tells me this. I think, maybe now I have made the wrong choice? Picked wrong Englishman? Jamie: She can't speak English properly, she doesn't know what she's saying. Jamie: [learning Portuguese] Oh my God, I've got a terrible stomach ache. It must have been the prawns. My goodness, this is a very big fish! It tastes delicious! Jamie: Beautiful Aurelia, I've come here with a view of asking you to marriage me. I know I seems an insane person - because I hardly knows you - but sometimes things are so transparency, they don't need evidential proof. And I will inhabit here, or you can inhabit with me in England. Sophia: [in Portuguese] Definitely go for England, girl. You'll meet Prince William - then you can marry him instead. Say it's carol singers. With any luck by next year, I'll be going out with one of these girls. But for now let me say, without hope or agenda, Just because it's Christmas- (and at Christmas you tell the truth) To me, you are perfect. And my wasted heart will love you until you look like this... Merry Christmas - Mark "Alone again... naturally." - Jamie Daniel: You know, Sammy, I'm sure she's unique and extraordinary, but... the general wisdom is that, in the end, there isn't just one person for each of us. Sam: There was for Kate and Leo. There was for you. There is for me. [holds up one finger] Sam: She's "the one". Daniel: Fair enough.  "There was more than one lobster present at the birth of Jesus?" - Karen Daniel: Tell her that you love her. Sam: No way! Anyway, they fly tonight. Daniel: Even better! Sam, you've got nothin' to lose, and you'll always regret it if you don't! I never told your mom enough. I should have told her everyday because she was perfect everyday. You've seen the films, kiddo. It ain't over 'til its over. Sam: Okay, Dad. Let's do it. Let's go get the shit kicked out of us by love. "True love lasts a lifetime." - Karen "Life is full of interruptions and complications." - Karl "All I want for Christmas, is you." - Judy "But you know, the thing about romance is... people only get together right at the very end." - Sam Colin: Exciting news! Tony: What? Colin: I've bought a ticket to the States. I'm off in three weeks. Tony: No! Colin: Yes! To a fantastic place called Wisconsin. Tony: No! Colin: Yes! Wisconsin babes, here comes Sir Colin! Whoo hoo! Tony: No, Col! There are a few babes in America, I grant you, but they're already going out with rich, attractive guys. Colin: Nah, Tone, you're just jealous. You know perfectly well that any bar anywhere in America contains ten girls more beautiful and more likely to have sex with me than the whole of the United Kingdom. Tony: That is total bollocks. You've actually gone mad, now. Colin: No, I'm wise. Stateside I am Prince William without the weird family. Tony: No, Colin, no! Colin: Yes! Tony: Nyet! Colin: Da! Tony: Nein! Colin: Ja, darling! "The trouble with being the Prime Minister's sister is, it does put your life into rather harsh perspective. What did my brother do today? He stood up and fought for his country. And what did I do? I made a paper maché lobster head." - Karen Prime Minister: I'd like to go to Wandsworth; the dodgy end. Terry: Very good, sir. [they drive to Wandsworth] Terry: Harris Street. What number, sir? Prime Minister: Oh, God. It's the longest street in the world, and I have absolutely no idea. Tony: "You'll come back a broken man."  Colin: "Yeah, back broken from too much sex!"  "I am Colin. God of Sex. I'm just on the wrong continent, that's all." - Colin "Well, you know the type. He's, uh, married to his job. Either that, or gay as a picnic basket." - John Harry: Tell me, exactly, how long it is that you've been working here? Sarah: Two years, seven months, three days and, I suppose, what... two hours? Harry: And how long have you been in love with Karl, our enigmatic chief designer? Sarah: Ahm, two years, seven months, three days and, I suppose, an hour and thirty minutes. Harry: I thought as much. Sarah: Do you think everybody knows?" Harry: Yes Sarah: Do you think karl knows? Sarah: Oh that is... that is bad news. Harry: Well I just thought maybe the time had come to do something about it. Sarah: Like what? Harry: Invite him out for a drink and then, after about twenty minutes, casually drop into the conversation the fact that you'd like to marry him and have lots of sex and babies. Sarah: You know that? Harry: Yes, and so does Karl. Think about it, for all our sakes. It's Christmas. Sarah: Certainly. Excellent. Will do. Thanks, boss!